Inner Game - The Art of Conversation

05 rujan 2012

This is a topic that supersedes the Game. It will improve your everyday, "normal" life.
Do you have problems keeping the conversation? You see your friends who can just talk about everything for hours?
Here are some tips you can try.

Be Interesting
When speaking about attraction, there are subjects that should be avoided. They are either boring and not attractive (e.g. weather) or tend to provoke quarrel (e.g. religion, politics). Talking about the job gave me some mixed results and it is a topic that will sooner or later come up. So what to do when it does?
First, never pop that question ("So what do you do for living?"). It will come by itself.

If you are in a Night Game scenario (aka clubs) say something that doesn't make sense like (by Mystery):
-hand model ("Can't you see how beautiful my nails are?")
-shark wrestler ("Those great whites throw a hard punch")
-bank robber ("And I need someone to help me with my next gig")
-double agent ("And I need your help to seduce a high ranking official")
-"You would not believe my if I told you"

I sometimes use it during a Day Game scenario, but for the Night Game it is a must (and depending on the girl, I will tease more or less).

Then, if she insists, I will tell her what I do. But that will not be my title and job position. I will have an interesting story to tell. Here is an example:

"I really don't like taking about my job. It is not that interesting subject. But since you asked. You see, I work for a large evil multinational company. I know what are you thinking, but it is better to be friends with them than fight them. Sue me. I work for a R&D department and when my company wants something developed, it buys it. My job is not to buy a shit." Then I take a glass or something that is near and explain the whole process as if we were buying that something customized. It is a nice story, problem is that I can't build any sexual aspects into it (as with my other DHV stories). But since this question usually pops early in the conversation it is OK.

Second, read. Read about what is going on in the world, your country, city, village,... Read books. It doesn't matter what are they about, but you will be more interesting than if you only watch TV. I read a book like this just for fun. And you would not imagine how often something from that book comes up handy in a conversation (you don't have to memories the entire book, my brain just likes to remember useless information).

Third, travel. There is no better way to have an interesting life the travelling. Travel as far as you can. I was lucky enough to see most of Europe while in high school. And that travelling (without me realizing) enriched my life. While travelling you get to experience other cultures and different way of life. And there is always going to be at least one interesting story. I didn't realize how many I had until I started playing the Game.

Lead the Conversation
Be able to lead the conversation where you want it to go. There are two tricks that help with this.
First, open multiple threads. Open up to a couple of threads when talking. Don't be afraid to jump from subject to subject even though previous subject was not finished. This leaves you a subject to jump back to when one finishes (or gets awkward). There are no those unpleasant silences (although silence should never be unpleasant).

Second, don't be afraid to cut someone's (or your's) thread. When I see that conversation is not heading where I want it to go, I will open a new thread (thus cutting the existing one) or just say something like "This topic is boring, can't you guys talk about nothing except..." (usually it is the job). Then they ask me what should we talk about and I have a couple of interesting topics (e.g. social dynamics, sex, etc).

The Conversation Algorithm
I was born with the art of rambling. But it took me a while to fine tune it. And I used this technique. (by B-Fusion)

Firstly, you can always have some conversation topics prepared. They can also be routines, openers and gambits. When you are an absolute beginner, use routines you read about on sites like this (aka canned material). Then from time, as you get better, you will modify these materials and start making yours. Example would be the customized "job story" with DHV spikes (or any DHV story based on your experience).

Secondly, become a good listener. Communicating is not only exchanging information. It is also noticing how others interpret exchanged information. That is an area women are usually better then men. One can easily improve this by analyzing key words in sentences. Let me give you an example. HB: "I just came from trip where I was visiting my aunt in Paris". You can start at least three threads from this sentence about: trip, aunt and Paris. E.g. "You travel a lot?", "Having relatives abroad is handy, I have some in...?" or "I didn't know you were part French.", "I was in Paris..." or "I would like to visit Paris, how is it?" or another million Paris related topics. This is an excellent way to jump to another topic. You might have noticed that not all key words are equally important. Trip to Paris carries much more importance then having an aunt there (it is more important for the HB). But they can be equally used to continue conversation.
When using this technique (and conversing in general) don't machine gun questions. Conversation in not an interview (although good interviews should not machine gun questions either). Ideally, ask your question then rumble about something. Then rumble some more and then ask another question. This is how natural conversation looks like. (by Roosh)

Thirdly, silence is your friend. There is nothing wrong with silence. Insecure people tend to find silence unpleasant ("OMG, was my performance interesting enough?"). Use silence to your advantage:
-You have time to sort your thoughts and think about what say next.
-Alpha behavior is not an insecure one and that is telegraphed by silence.
-It builds tension which is good (tension buildup and release is a key to attraction).


These are general notes about making a good conversation. I didn't go purposely about any particular gambit or at which part of the interaction you should use what kind of conversation. These will be covered in future topics.
Try this and let me know if it helped.

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